Welcome to the latest post in the AUTHORS REVIEWING THEIR OWN BOOKS series!
Today we have Derek Alan Siddoway, the mastermind behind the Undaunted Author and Everyday Author sites (links below) reviewing…wait. Nope! It seems some of his characters have snuck in. Apparently, instead of reviewing the book, they’ve called some kind of press-release.
Best read on…
Herald: Introducing his majesty, High King Arund, the White Knight, the Scourge of the Highlanders, the Sword of Skaldain!
People gather in a crowd below the platform within the ransacked city of Athelon. There are bloodstains on the stone and smoke still rises from some of the upper terraces, where, judging by the raucous sounds of yelling and screaming, looting is still well underway. Arund the White Knight, of late, the self-styled High King of all Peldrin takes the stand.
Arund: Thank you, everyone, for coming. What a great day. What a momentous day in the history of our country. I never doubted it. I crushed the rebellion and united all of Peldrin. Where are the naysayers now? So, who’s got questions? I’ve got answers, great answers.
Skald: General Arund —
Arund: High King now, actually. In case you hadn’t heard — I won!
Skald: *Clears throat* Umm, yes. High King Arund. While your “March across Peldrin” was a success on parchment, you’ve left a bloody swathe in your wake. Thousands are dead — mostly the common folk who supported your cause. Tens of thousands more are homeless, injured or starving. And now, you’ve conquered Athelon, the last bastion of resistance, but only after weeks of siege that drained untold amounts of gold from the Republic’s coffers. What is your message to the peasantry?
Arund: My message is the same as it’s always been. I’ve never changed. I said I was going to make Peldrin great again. Now it’s great. Just like I said. When people get in the way of progress that’s what happens. But now we can rebuild. We’ll be bigger and better than ever. We’ve already brought thousands of jobs back to honest, hardworking swordsmiths, armorers and siege engineers everywhere.
Second Skald: Wasn’t Peldrin already pretty great? I mean we had a Republic that built roads, fostered trade and —
Arund: Sure, that’s what they want you to believe. Trust me, it wasn’t great. I was on the inside. I saw things. I know things about the former Republic that would make your skin crawl. Peldrin was a disaster.
Second Skald: Wasn’t the goal of your campaign to unite Peldrin? It seems like a death march across half the land, culminating in a dreadful siege that was only ended by killing one of your oldest and closest friends is pretty…dividing.
Arund: Look, nobody wanted to kill Mathyew less than me. Trust me. Nobody liked Mathyew more than me. The Lord of Athel was like a brother to me. We were so close you can’t even imagine. But there’s one thing you can’t do. You can’t stand between the White Knight and victory. You just can’t. It’s not going to end well for you if you do. I’ve never been defeated.
Second Skald: But what about that battle against the Highland Confederation back in —
Arund: Next question, please.
Third Skald: We’ve heard reports that your troops were massacring refugees and survivors who fled Athelon to the surrounding beaches. The reports also indicated that Lady Guinevere, her young son Revan and her handmaiden, Reginleif were on the beaches.
Arund: Look, I’m in the business of peace, not killing women and children.
First Skald: *Points across the courtyard* Isn’t that a dead woman over there?
Arund: I’ve said it all along, we’re going to be so tough on rebels. Trust me, no one has ever been tougher on rebels than me and no one will continue to be tougher on rebels than me. If any man, woman or child raises a sword against me, we’re going to have to take action. It’s the only way to keep our borders safe.
Third Skald: Yes, but where are Lady Guinevere, Revan and her handmaiden now?
Arund: I’ve got trained professionals out looking for the Lady of Athel right now. Our number one priority is finding her and ensuring she’s safe. Nobody is more worried about Guinevere and little Revan than me, trust me. I consider them family.
Second Skald: This seems to conflict an account we’ve received that your “trained professionals” pursued Lady Guinevere into the wilderness of Athel. They were led by Captain Theron Fitch, a man known for his brutality. According to the report, Fitch then conspired with local Sylvad hunters — sworn enemies of the Athelings, I might add — to aid in the capture of Lady Guinevere.
Arund: That’s completely ridiculous. False information. Never happened.
First Skald: It’s all right here in a book: Into Exile by one Derek Alan Siddoway.
Arund: Look, I don’t know where this book came from, but it’s clearly biased against my campaign to unite all Peldrin under my banner. Someone is just jealous that my victory was so complete and absolute that they’re spreading these lies. Don’t be fooled, people. The Council War was the most definitive victory in the history of all Peldrin. If Lady Guinevere doesn’t want to bow to me, she’s on her own.
Third Skald: But you just said that finding Lady Guinevere and her son and ensuring their safety was your number one —
Arund: *Waves hand* Look, this public address is over. I don’t need to deal with this right now. I’ve got a country to make great again! Anything in that book by that Siddoway man is completely untrue. Not a single fact in there. I’ve read the whole thing. Bunch of fabricated lies, trust me. Anyone who reads that is a stars-damned imbecile and is guilty of treason. The first
thing I’m coming to do when I get back to the capital is decree every copy of this “Into Exile” is burned.
Second Skald: *sighs*
Into Exile – Official Synopsis:
Widowed. Hunted. Exiled. From the ashes of destruction, a saga begins.
When her country is conquered and her lord husband slain by his best friend, Guinevere, Lady of Athel, has only one thing left to live for: her young son Revan. Forsaking vengeance to honor her husband’s last wish, Guinevere flees with Revan — the last heir of the Teutevar line. Exile, however, will not come easy. Pursued by ruthless invaders and a wilderness full of bloodthirsty savages, Guinevere’s only allies are a loyal spearmaiden and a deranged mountain man. The Lady of Athel may not fear death, but should she fail, Athel’s last hope falls with her.
Into Exile is a introductory prequel that takes place before the events of Out of Exile in the world of Teutevar Saga. Fans of Joe Abercrombie’s Red Country and Miles Cameron’s Traitor Son Cycle will enjoy the Teutevar Saga and its unique blend of traditional medieval fantasy in a gritty, American Western landscape.
For a limited time, get Into Exile FREE at all major ebook sellers: https://books2read.com/u/mvYjaJ
For more shenanigans check out Derek in the following places: